1. I’m too young for it.
While it is true that impotence is more likely to occur in older men, it does occur in young men as well; and when it occurs, the effect can be very serious to one’s self esteem and confidence. Many believe that impotence in young men happen mostly due to psychological factors such as anxiety and depression but existing health condition, smoking and substance abuse can attribute to the problem too.
2. It is a normal part of aging.
Getting older does not mean that it is normal for you to get impotence. Although male impotence occurs more frequently in older men, it is not a normal part of aging. In fact, it is not normal to occur at any age and men with impotence should seek treatment and find the cause of the problem regardless whether they are young or old.
3. I’m the only one with this problem. No one else I know is having it.
Male impotence is a common problem. In USA alone, it affects 20 to 46% men aged 40 to 69 with 26 new cases per 1,000 men aged 40 to 69 is reported in 2000. Knowing you are not alone and get to know from others’ experiences is important to help you cope better with it.
4. It is caused by tight underwear.
Tight underwear can be a factor in producing low sperm count but it is not to be blamed as a cause of impotence.
5. Impotence is all in my mind.
Most cases of male impotence are due to physical cause. Only 10-20% of cases are psychological. Therefore, a consultation with your doctor is important to know the cause of the problem. In fact, impotence itself can be an important sign for an underlying medical problem such as heart disease. 70% of men who had cardiovascular event (heart problem) reveal that they were experiencing problem with erection for an average of about four years before the event. This is not surprising because impotence reflects problem such as blockage to the small blood vessels in the body and if left untreated, the blockage will spread to larger blood vessels such as those in the heart.
6. Impotence is a man’s problem. I don’t need to let my partner know about it.
Male impotence is not only a man’s problem. It matters to your partner as much as it matters to you. Choosing to keep your partner in the dark about the problem you are facing is not a good choice and can be damaging to your relationship.
A woman feels the same way as a man feels when the problem of impotence occur in a relationship – frustrated, anger, guilt and feeling a sense of fear of rejection; and as the problem drags on without a proper discussion between a couple, many partners choose to divert their energy and focus to something else – job, friends, hobbies etc. Eventually, they stop spending time with each other, stop touching, stop talking and before they know it, they stop communicating with each other.
7. No one talks about it.
Male impotence is a problem affecting many men around the world. However, despite being one of the commonest men’s health problems, many still find it an uncomfortable topic for discussion. Impotence is not new, and people actually do talk about it, and they also have been trying to find its remedies for ages. That is why you can find a lot of beliefs and traditional recipes from various societies and cultures meant to help people with impotence that had been passed through generations. Therefore, if you are having this problem, you too should discuss about it – especially with your doctor and your partner.
8. Viagra helps in every case.
Although Viagra and other impotence pills work well in most cases, they do not work in all cases. The success rate of these pills varies from 70 to 85%. Since they work by expanding the blood vessel in the penis, these pills do not work well if the damage to the blood vessel is bad, causing it to become too rigid for it to expand.
9. Oh no! Viagra is not working. There is no more hope.
Viagra and the other impotence pills are not the only treatment available. There are other treatments that can be considered if these pills are not working or are not suitable for you. These treatment options include injectable drugs, pellets, vacuum pump and penile implant. Make sure you take the impotence pills as instructed and discuss with your doctor if you think they are not working for you.
10. It’s the end of my relationship.
A healthy relationship is not all about erection. Don’t forget about the things that you can still do – kissing, fondling, caressing and speaking of your love. Make it a time for you to explore things that both you and your partner can do together. Find ways to remain intimate even when erection is not possible.
By H Sidek